Jacob's Clean, Close Shave

Stephenie Meyer Update

Um...y'all have to read Stephenie Meyer's February 11th post on her website.  Usually her brother, Seth (where have I heard that name before??) runs the site, but the February 11th entry is a tremendous update from Stephenie, regarding what she's been doing with her time for the past year!

Um, hello?  Austenland?!  OMG!  LOVE!!!

Edward vs. Tate

Holy crap.  I almost cheated on Edward.  I'm sorry but THIS is way cool.  I can't help it; I love Tate.

Why Grown Women Love Twilight

Thanks to Julia for sending me this little ditty.  SO true!!

My BREAKING DAWN Review

There will be no wine  before its time.

And there will be no Breaking Dawn review from Carol before its time either, bitches!!!

So I went with a whole slew of fellow Twi-chicks to see the film on Friday at 10AM (no tweens).  In the words of my sister, Tracey..."It was ridiculous...and AWESOME...at the same time."

As you all know, I haven't looked at much of anything since Breaking Dawn started filming.  And I would advise ALL OF YOU to do the same for the last movie.  My crew was telling themselves it didn't matter that they googled and watched trailers and took it all in beforehand...but I beg to differ.  When you don't know what it will be visually...and then you sit down and watch...oh my god it's absolutely mind-blowing.  SO much better than going in KNOWING what it will all look like.

OK but enough about that.  Let's get to it.

Stunning, party of this!

Loved the snot outta this dress. 

The wedding.  Gorgeous setting and I LOVED the dress.  Why? Because it was completely Edwardian and I knew Edward would love it.  The whole damned film made me squeee with the thought of how happy he would be.  Well - until Bella decided to be all freaky on the couch.  But we'll get to that in a min.

Let's fast foward to the Honeymoon, shall we?  Seeing Edward in that water was so delicious - almost as good as I pictured it in my head.  Loved Bella's freak-out, human minutes.  It was SO real; we all would have done that.  I love how Edward saunters his ass into the water, thinking nothing at all about the nookie that is about to transpire.  SUCH a guy.

Really?  You expect me not to
HOWL at this?  REALLY?!

The headboard scene?  I LAUGHED!  Right out loud!  Loudest one in the theatre!!!  I couldn't HELP it!  It was FUNNY!!!  I truly expected everyone to laugh and him to make a snide comment...but it never came.  And then I was horrified that I laughed at something everyone else took so seriously!  Is there something wrong with me?

Before...after! Before...after!

Wasn't thrilled with the carnage in the bedroom.  I mean, really?  I get that he's all strong...but c'mon.  They're both virgins.  It would have been way more tame than that.  But whatever - no complaints from me.  No way.

Let's move on.  Loved that they kept the fried chicken in the film.  Loved that Edward looked like he was going to cry and run around screaming "find a happy place!! at the same time when he found out Bella was knocked up.  SO classic.  It's killing me that I can't sit and watch each scene 80 million times like I did with Twilight since the first time I saw that was when it came out on video.

YOU'VE LEFT ME NO CHOICE!!!

And now...I will come to the most fantastic part of the film.  "YOU'VE LEFT ME NO CHOICE!!!"  to which I screamed "YES!!!" and fist pumped 10 or 12 times right there in the theatre.  And now, every time I watch the trailer, I do it again.  Today I yelled "NICE!" at that part and was afraid I scared my kids.  Bottom line - we all know how much I HATED Wimpy Edward in Book 4.  It bugged the crap out of me that he was laying in Bella's lap and whimpering instead of opening up that sarcastic mouth and fighting for what he wanted.  And in this film, he did that.  And did it fantastically.

Edward Cullen getting his ass kicked
would never, EVER HAPPEN!

And it made up for them letting him get his ass kicked in New Moon when we all know Edward Cullen ain't nevah gettin' his ass kicked, no way...no how.

Loved Jacob through the whole film...although I wished his sarcasm came through better in the film like it did in the book.  In the book he was hilarious and in the film he was just pissed.

I dug all the wolfified stuff...although we all agreed it was a bit of a creepfest to watch the wolves talk when they were in wolf form.  But how else could they have done it?  I don't know.  Maybe from further away...like we could have been looking down on them from a rooftop angle.  But please, not that skanky roof on Jacob's skanky red house that he should stay home and paint once in a while instead of chasing vampires.  Ugh...gross.  Every time I see it, I get the shakes.

Not in my nature.  Yummy Emmett. 

And, um, I'm sorry...but did anyone notice how Emmett KICKED ASS in this movie?!  LOVED him!  And they didn't even show all his smartass commentary while Bella was pregnant!  He just makes my day with every one of his (very small) lines.

LOVED the birth scene.  Edward BROUGH IT in every way possible.  They changed a few things as far as order of the way they happened...but not enough to get under my skin in any way.  LOVED that they showed Edward dive down and dig in with le teeth.  Genius way of showing that it happened - but NOT showing it happen.  Brills.

I can't WAIT for the next film.  Could SOMEONE please tell me why we have to wait an entire YEAR???

Here comes the smolder...

Oh and Carlisle's Hair:  SO NOT HAPPY!  WHAT has happened to that poor gorgeous man?!  How does one go from this  --------------->

                                   

Bad angle...bad lighting...bad hair...
A world of Carlisle badness!

<-----------------To THIS?!

They have reduced him to NOTHING (I think ESME had more lines!) and have given him the worst hair on the planet.  Seriously. It's just so sad.  I'm thinking of camping out in Zuccotti Park in protest.

That's all I got for now but I KNOW there is more.  I'll keep you posted on the goings on of my brain.

In The Theatre!!!!

In the theatre with Tracey, Jenn D, Jenn M and Shannon, waiting for Breaking Dawn to start. And freaking out. Just a bit. Ok a lot. Squee!!!


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Torn

I thought it was a fitting week to whip this one back out again...

3 MORE DAYS!

THREE MORE DAYS and if I see one more commercial I am going to flip out.  There were no less than THREE on last night and I had to run or change the channel every time.  It's so upsetting.  I don't want to see ANYTHING until Friday!!!  :)

NO BREAKING DAWN TRAILERS...EVER!!!

I DID IT!  ABC showed a Breaking Dawn "sneak peak" trailer during Modern Family and I didn't watch or listen!  I put my fingers in my ears and said "lalalalalala" like my 6 year old - until it was over!!! (The funny part about that is that it was about 20 minutes ago.  We were watching on the DVR and forgot we could fast forward!)

Take THAT, Hollywood!  I don't want to watch and I will NOT watch until November 18th...when I CAN FINALLY WATCH!!!  ;)

PS - from the quick, accidental glimpse I did catch...is it me or does Edward look more made-up than ever?  Yikes.  He looked like he was about to spray me with something musky at the L'ANCOME counter!

Carol Comes out of Hiding

WOW.   I haven't posted in a ridiculously long time! 

I just wanted to update you guys and let you know I am keeping good on my promise.  I have NOT actively sought-out or looked at a photo - or video - from Breaking Dawn since those first shots came out of Edward and Bella at the street fair on their honeymoon.

Get this - I WALKED OUT OF A TRAILER at the movies a few weeks ago.  How's THAT for being true to my word?  It came on and my friend Nancy sucks in her breath and I go "WHAT?!" and she says "YOU - of all people - don't KNOW?!"  I IMMEDIATELY stand up - and walk out.  More like RUN out.  Giggle.  And then proceed to email some of my TwiBuds from my iPhone and say  "I am alone in the lobby at the movies because I walked out on the Breaking Dawn trailer!!"

One thing I HAVE seen is the official poster - see above (note the "play" button which shows I took it right off the front page and did NOT press "play") - because I'm an IMDb dweeb and there is just NO way to avoid it. It reminds me of an ad from the 70s where he's feeling her smooth skin.  Although he looks like he's about ready to assault her - and she looks like she likes it.  Snicker.  Well wouldn't you?!

ALSO - I will avoid the commercials when they start airing.  I am THAT committed to being totally surprised and thrilled at the film when it finally comes out on November 18th. 

It's been hard...but I can wait...because that's ALL SHE WROTE!  LITERALLY! ROFLMAO!  This is IT!  Once BD1 and BD2 come out - it's all OVAH!

Oh and PS - an open letter to Stephenie Meyer:

Dear Stephenie, 

First off - what's up, girl?!  

Second - please finish Midnight Sun, mmmmkay? 

Thanks!  Love ya!  Mean it!

Carol

My Purgatory Dot Com

Just wanted to fill y'all in on what's happening with the new website.  I've created so many blogs, I wanted to combine them all in one place.  I also wanted somewhere to talk about non-Twilight things...like True Blood...Game of Thrones...celeb gossip and the like.  Tracey and I will be making some videos that we hope will have you laughing your ass off or (hopefully not) running screaming from your computer!

Thus - mypurgatory.com is now live.  

The blogs will all remain at their own addresses - ie - mytwilightpurgatory.com - but they will also now be housed in one place over at mypurgatory.

I want to throw a massive THANK YOU out to an awesome guy named Stephen who selflessly gave me the domain "mypurgatory.com".  I also want to point out that he has the COOLEST Etsy store called Steampunk Movement Studio and I would love it if you'd check it out!

TLaut Ups His Ride

I know I don't usually post about the actors...but this just made me giggle. Looks like someone's not driving a VW Rabbit anymore. The funniest part about this story? "With his parents".

Kristen Stewart In Forbes Top 10 List Of Highest Paid Actresses In Hollywood - Breaking Dawn

Now HERE'S a head-scratcher of epic proportions...

Kristen Stewart In Forbes Top 10 List Of Highest Paid Actresses In Hollywood - Breaking Dawn

Twilight Restaurant Scene

Just came across the restaurant scene from Twilight on TV.  Whenever I come across it, I can't turn it off.  And I never gave it much thought - until tonight.  I think I finally figured it out.  This is one of the scenes in the series that shows the true Edward Cullen.  I suppose I should give Rob Pattinson kudos because he really brings out so many facets of Edward's personality in this scene:  protective...sarcastic...funny...a smart-ass...it's all there.  Take a look.  (And ignore the oddness that is the end of this version.  The video was just so much better in this than all the rest on youtube.  But the end is...well...just take a look. LOL)

Filmmaker Statement Regarding Breaking Dawn Leaks

Dear Twilight Saga fans,

As some of you may know, pictures and screen grabs of The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn as a work in progress have leaked on the internet. We are extremely proud of this film and also extremely heartbroken to see it out there at this stage.

The film and these images are not yet ready or in their proper context. They were illegally obtained and their early dissemination is deeply upsetting to the actors, the filmmakers and Summit who are working so hard to bring these movies to fruition to you in November 2011 and November 2012.

Please, for those who are posting, stop. And please, though the temptation is high, don’t view or pass on these images. Wait for the film in its beautiful, finished entirety to thrill you.

Sincerely,

Stephenie Meyer, Bill Condon, Wyck Godfrey and Summit Entertainment

What you Need for your Vampire Boyfriend

Holy crap, this is the most boring blog on the planet right now!  I can't help it; I refuse to look at any of the Breaking Dawn movie stuff online!  It's the last hurrah, people!  I don't want to see it before the movie comes out (in 8 million months)!

So...there isn't much to blog about right now.  COMMA HOWEVER, I just ran into this juicy little morsel on FunnyOrDie.com - and just about fell off my damned chair.  I know it's a recycle since I've posted it before, but who cares?  Watch it and see how quickly YOU fall of your chair, too!

Twilight Cycles from Brandon Routh

Literal Eclipse

Love.

My Twilight AND Outlander Purgatory!

Before watching this video, I have a few disclaimers:

1) It is for entertainment purposes only...aka it's supposed to make y'all giggle and I don't mean to step on any toes and I credited everyone at the end.

2) I am a total video amateur and it shows. But I couldna help it, Sassenachs. I just... had to make it.

3) I hope you like it. :)

Jasper Hale Doll

Oh holy hell... THIS just about made me pee my pantalones. $149.00!!! Now.. don't get me wrong.. I love myself some Jasper Hale. But really? REALLY?! Then again - he does come with the Cullen bracelet. Not too shabby!! Another thing I love is the groovy hair. I think it's more groovy than Jackson Rathbone's! 

Robert Pattinson To Play ‘Renesmee’s Lullaby’ In Breaking Dawn!

Oh my god. THIS news from breakingdawnmovie.org is SQUEELICIOUS!!!! We've been waiting since TWILIGHT to hear/see RPattz play again! (insert nervous laughter here)